Becoming a Mother

Mothering, as it turns out, is not as easy as I assumed it would be. When my daughter was born, I imagined there would be this 'mom switch' that would immediately turn on and I would innately know what to do at every pass; that it would come easily to me.  This, however, wasn't the case.  The first few months were extremely difficult for me.  This is not to say that I couldn't care for my daughter, I was just fine at caring for her physically - the feedings, changing, bathing etc...it was more the emotional aspect that I lacked in.

My daughter was born via c-section, which was definitely NOT planned - but that's a whole other post for another time so I'll leave it at that.  I was a mess after she was born, I was physically and mentally exhausted and felt as though my world, the world as I knew it, had been flipped about...turned upside down and inside out.  Looking back, it was such an odd feeling...coming home with this little being - this new person that I was responsible for.  It was so overwhelming to have so much dependent upon me.  I mean, I could barely take care of myself and felt like a mack truck had driven right through me. I relied on my very supportive husband and my mother-in-law during the first few weeks at home.  I don't know how I would have survived it without them!  They were a tag team beyond belief!  Changing diapers, making bottles, doing the laundry, dishes, sanitizing the bottles, more diapers, more laundry...it was a whirlwind adventure for sure!  A wild ride, but a good one :)  I am very grateful to have had this support, it made a world of difference having them by my side.

You know, no one tells you how hard it is to raise a newborn.  I mean, you'll get the occasional sleep deprivation comment: "Oh, hope you don't like your sleep because you won't be getting any for the next year!" or "kiss your sleep goodbye!"  But what about the emotional aspect of parenting?  The sleep deprivation I can handle...it was the overwhelming sense of responsibility for this new little human being that we created that hit me the hardest.  I thought we were 'all grown up' because we were married and had bought a home, but parenting, I realized, is the epitome of adulthood.

My struggles in the first few months of my daughter's life were a serious weight on my shoulders.  I felt like a failure as a mother because I was having all of these feelings and was afraid to discuss them for fear of someone knowing that I had failed.  Being that I'm in my thirties, most of my friends either already had or were having children around the same time as me.  As I began tentatively talking about my experience and my feelings of inadequacy as a mother, I was amazed to find that many of my friends had or were having similar experiences and feelings.  Here I was, thinking I was isolated and alone in my feelings and yet, there were other moms out there who were having the same issues!  It sounds horrible to say this, but I was happy that I wasn't alone in these feelings.

I have several friends who had their babies shortly after me and would call looking for support and answers from me.  I was completely flattered and was so glad to share what I had experienced and to pass along any advice that I could that would help them in their journeys as mothers.  I realized that the old adage 'it takes a village to raise a child' is absolutely true.  I wish that I had looked for support from other moms early on.  I know of several new moms groups in my area and would definitely take advantage of these support circles early on the next time around.  I am actually considering starting my own mothers circle with women that I know so that we have a place to share, vent and receive support from other women who are passing through or have already gone through the same milestones in mothering.

Cloth Diapering, Knitted Wool Covers

The cloth diapering experience has been going well, thus far.  In reading other mothering and cloth diapering blogs, I have found that many people make their own cloth diapers.  This inspired me to want to make my own for Aaralyn and to start building a stash before we have another baby.  

I have some sewing skills but am definitely still a novice, I am, however, an intermediate level knitter.  So, that being considered, I started to look for knitted diaper covers and discovered all the wondrous properties of 100% wool.   Many people use wool soakers, which are pulled on like shorts over a cloth diaper.  Wool can hold up to 40% of its weight in water before it will begin to feel damp, so it is an excellent choice for a diaper.  It also  has natural antibacterial properties and apparently will clean itself if it gets wet with urine just by air drying.  This means that the covers don't have to be washed as frequently as the fleece/plastic covers.  

The downside to wool is that it has to be hand washed or the fibers will end up binding together and it will become felted.  There are a ton of wool diaper washing tutorials online that boast how easy it is, so, I'm going to give it a whirl.  

I made a cover this week and posted it to my knitting blog today.  I used some left over Araucania hand dyed wool that I had in my stash.  It is absolutely beautiful and reminds me of a tie dyed t-shirt!

Here is a pic of the finished diaper wrap:

My Daughter, the Frosty Enthusiast

My daughter has a slight, dare I call it...obsession, with Frosty the Snowman.  Yes, that lovable, singing snowman from our childhood memories, the one from the television special that premiered year after year during the holiday season.
Aari will request this video over and over again.  I think it takes her to her "happy place."  She snuggles up and relaxes with her favorite stuffed animal of the day (currently Curious George) and smiles up at the screen, captivated for the entirety of the musical sensation that is Frosty.
Any white fluffy object that even remotely resembles a snowman is a "Frosty" to her.  This includes the life sized cardboard Michelin Man cutout at our local wholesale club!

Frosty the Snowman Groupie!

She's like a Frosty groupie or something!  Every time we go shopping she practically jumps out of the cart with excitement - screaming "Frosty! Frosty! Frosty!"  It's adorable.  When you bring her closer she starts having a conversation with him..."Oh, Hi Frosty!"  People probably thought me a little strange as I was taking a picture of my daughter with the Michelin Man. :)
The Pillsbury Doughboy has also become part of her Frosty fixation :)  The frozen isle was a lot of fun!  She was spotting him on a bunch of the frozen items and was clapping and giggling.
One of Aaralyn's little play date friends has a singing and dancing Frosty.  You want to talk about putting someone over the edge?  You should have seen her when she first discovered this toy!  I don't think she let go of him for the majority of our time there.  I am on the lookout for one to give her for her birthday :)

Math Concepts

Math helps children develop critical thinking and problem solving skills.  Formal arithmetic, addition, subtraction, division, multiplication, etc..., is just one aspect of mathematics.  Math is all around us and we use it in our everyday lives, most of the time without even thinking about it; from estimation to spatial awareness, measurement and even patterns.
Children learn through play and exploration of their environment.  That is why, when choosing my daughter's activities, I base them on play.  I want her learning experience to be fun and exciting.  Could I whip out flash cards and drill things into her cute little head in the hopes that she'll memorize what I'm trying to teach her?  Sure, I could but I would rather her gain knowledge of these concepts through her own exploration, learning each step of a concept along the way.
One of the ways that young children learn about math is to group and match objects.  I have various sorting activities that I use with Aaralyn on a daily basis.  We use counting and number vocabulary and through play, she groups objects together, experiments with patterns, shapes and measurement and collects and organizes the various materials that are available to her.
For this activity, she had various items available to her: sea shells, shiny glass stones in a big and small variety and large felt squares.

Here she is touching and exploring the items

She is continuing her exploration and started naming the objects

She started counting the objects

I started grouping similar objects together and she followed suit

I expanded the activity by putting one of each object on a separate felt square and she started grouping like objects together

My husband is a mathematical genius, I, on the other hand, am NOT!  I have trouble remembering how to add and subtract!  Even though I'm no math whiz, I am still going to make math a part of her everyday learning so that she will have a solid foundation for her formal arithmetic training when she gets older, and I want her early learning to be fun!  Play, play, play!  It's the best way for her to learn and there will be plenty of time for the not so fun stuff when she is older.